69DonaldTrump69: My dad always told me if you’re jacking it to be ready for anything or whatever. I always figured he meant somebody walking in but he could have meant a volcano I guess.
TheSeaInAStorm: Imagine his terror and confusion as everything starts exploding and he thinks everyone who told him masturbation angered the gods was right
kg989: At least he died doing what he loved.
>The individual in the photo is an adult man, killed by the hot pyroclastic surge (hot gas and ash cloud which killed most of the population living around Mount Vesuvius), with both arms and legs flexed due to the heat,” Dr. Pier Paolo Petrone, a volcanologist, told the Daily Dot Monday. Furthermore, as the Dot explains, even if the man had been doing that thing everyone thinks he was doing at the time of eruption, the pose we’re left with in this photo would only have happened after the heat bent his limbs.
BlueWoool: What would you do when you know you are going to die?
Demderdemden: No, today you were too lazy to read the whole article. A bunch of kids and the hacker known as 4chan saying it looks like he’s masturbating does not make it true.
malvoliosf: That’s called the “pugilistic pose”. Bodies that are badly burnt curl up. It has nothing to do with what he was doing _pre mortem_.
BobT21: “If your erection persists for over two centuries, contact an anthropologist.”
ElHijodePutaMadre: “Go away! Batin!” – Famous Last Words
itty53: Pretty sure we can [retire this Mallrats reference now.]
BasedOnAir: I find it impossible to believe that somebody jacking it wouldn’t even be able to flinch at the sound before going through the entire process of dying. No way that pose was actually masturbation.
addysol: Yeah nah, this dude died screaming not wanking
a56fg4bjgm345: I bet he was rock hard
pvab: The volcano wasn’t the only thing erupting
matrixkid29: little did historians know; there were two eruptions that day.
bu dum tsss
PlzDontBeMe: Pompei was actually likely to be a place with a LOT of prostitution going on.
So this guy was probably broke.
serpentxx: Holy shit that horrible news site OP, spammy
cynikalAhole99: go out doing what ya love..
remarqer: People should just let this go, the guy was in the middle of a disaster and obviously had his hands full.
thxxx1337: He looks pretty comfortable
ITSlave401: An interrupted eruption during an impending eruption ending the orgasm which forever is enshrined.
Valetudo83: Two volcanos erupting at once. Mt. Vesuvius and Mini Vesuvius.
Rabid-Child: Dissappointed that the government isnt doing more to stop volcanoes , we are ALL at risk.
Deked: But its the Mirror so…
baratas: Vesuvius in the streets. Pompeii in the sheets.
PM_ME_YOUR_ZR: If I were being covered in burning ash I’d want to cover my junk from that
Hello_Mr_Fancypants: That would be my luck.
gMoneytz: Fun’s fun, but this was a real person, that died a gruesome death. The position is just a coincidence.
The guy deserves some dignity, and not 2000 years in the future, to be seen as a punchline.
suckboyjake: *That’s the best picture of Kellyanne Conway I’ve ever seen!*
rockandrollmonster: I bet that was an explosive orgasm
slm4996: Probably just trying to cover his junk. Seriously, that’s what I’d do if lava was coming for it an I couldn’t run. I even do that when first stepping into a hot tub, got to ease the boys into that heat!
cchris_39: I’ve been looking for a new screen name.
Unknown_T_Girl_420: I honestly did not see this coming…
IBangedUrMomAndUrDad: [We’re all thinking it](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=2A_n_zwIZk4&t=41s)
BonafideZoocity: Master Debater
bourbon_bottles: Hero.
ModernDayCinderella: I mean, that’s what I would do if I knew I was about to die. Might as well go out with a few minutes of bliss.
metalclassicrock123: OP you might wanna NSFW this.
MyParentsAre_Cousins: Fuck Yeah, there’s a picture! So often articles like this where you really need to see the subject lacks pictures.
kidkick3r: jeez guy didn’t even finish
bittersocialjustice1: Aids website.
SpenceOrSpencer: I have to say, crappy layout aside, that is a great title in the original site: “A Good Day to Die Hard?”
roboblobo: No time to evac. Might as well ejac.
PFBComedy: [always have your volcano pose ready](https://youtu.be/NdWO1OwZ8Is)
Metalworks13: The article says that experts say that this isn’t the case.
tinylittlebabyjesus: This man is finally getting the recognition he deserves for being a goddamn LEGEND!
Lizardman548: [Was he really doing what he loved?](https://amp.www.complex.com/life/2017/07/pompeii-masturbator-meme)
bolanrox: Well, did he finish or not?!?!
screenwriterjohn: Semper fi.
travistee: This is just so immature, dumb and unrealistic. No human would masturbate in this situation.
Disrespectful to the dead.