Trump used folder bearing ‘classified’ wording to block light keeping him awake at night, lawyer says

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Comments

  1. JoshIsASoftie says

    This headline is dangerously Onion-y

  2. JimC29 says

    This is probably a good use. I’m guessing it’s in a dark folder.

  3. chronoquairium says

    I mean, was it being used for anything else, or would it have been? If not I don’t see a problem here

  4. SelectiveSanity says

    Judge: That is, by far, the stupidest defense I’ve ever heard in regards to traitorous actions against these Untied States.

    Lawyer: Your honor, my client is former President Trump.

    Judge: Well that explains a lot.

  5. menlindorn says

    >“He has one of those landline telephones next to his bed, and it has a blue light on it, and it keeps him up at night,” Parlatore said. “So he took the manila folder and he put it over it so that it would keep the light down so he could sleep at night.”

    I feel like a piece of tape would solve this. Or, you know, buy a phone without a light.

  6. Skripka says

    Trump also tells his chauffeur to cover the burning Check Engine Light with electric tape

  7. RandySto says

    I would suggest a black plastic bag with it snugged around his neck to keep all light out.

    Very effective

  8. Swimming_Student7990 says

    I guess he had a lot of blue lights to cover up at Mar-a-Lago

  9. CannonFodder141 says

    “So now the former president has to find a new way to keep the blue light out of his eyes.”

    Trump’s lawyer said this as though this is a major challenge for Trump, rather than something any given 5-year-old should be able to figure out.

  10. blind_stone says

    Wait so do I? Is this thing not allowed?

  11. Cinema_King says

    Wait, is this the folder he never had or the one that was planted by the FBI?

    It’s getting hard to keep up with all his stories

  12. Mootingly says

    I bet he kissed the folder every night and said “I love you”

  13. OldGrandet says

    They misspelled “used folder to beat off on to feel powerful.”

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