Old School Texas Police Chief: Ok we’ll position 3 officers by the southern window here and 2 by each door perpendicular side of the room and get them in a fatal funnel. That’ll teach those c00ns to try and teach their CRT nonsense-
Police Officer with Average intelligence: Uh, Chief. I think we’re dealing with **actual** raccoons here. You know, trash pandas.
Old School Texas Police Chief: Oh god, you mean they’re part of the CCP?!
ButtFuzzington says
Not surprisingly, students in the affected classrooms learned more than they have all year.
[deleted] says
[removed]
SelectiveSanity says
Old School Texas Police Chief: Ok we’ll position 3 officers by the southern window here and 2 by each door perpendicular side of the room and get them in a fatal funnel. That’ll teach those c00ns to try and teach their CRT nonsense-
Police Officer with Average intelligence: Uh, Chief. I think we’re dealing with **actual** raccoons here. You know, trash pandas.
Old School Texas Police Chief: Oh god, you mean they’re part of the CCP?!
JHinExile says
“I once saw a pack of wild dogs take over and successfully run a Wendy’s!”
DanFuckingSchneider says
They’re doing their best, okay?
please_PM_ur_bewbs says
Texas GOP desperately trying to figure out how to make sure those raccoons have guns. To protect the children, of course.
Dan-68 says
Good pets for biology class.
Mermaid-52 says
Someone should make a clip of this with the sound track from “The Good the Bad And the Ugly.” You have the students, the raccoon and the cops.
Husbandaru says
Did the animal control wait hours before doing anything?
mastelsa says
“The raccoon problem is under control. They have their part of the town and we have ours.”
BaltimoreBadger23 says
They were removed quickly after asserting that women might be people too.
Scazzz says
Don’t worry, the police will move in within the next 5-6 hours once the racoons have already done their damage and moved on.
SevroAuShitTalker says
Where’s Leslie Knope when you need her
Imtypingthisnow says
Considering the teacher shortage and the fact that TX despises public education, Gov Abbot has declared that they are now teachers!